A Preacher’s Daughter

I have a confession to make:

I am a preacher’s daughter.

My dad has been in ministry ever since I can remember.  He’s an elder in the denomination I grew up in and gets to sit right next to the pastor in the pulpit.  As much as that can be interpreted as subtle sarcasm, it is not actually was not meant to be.  It can be a wonderful experience to have a father that has answered the Lord’s call and devoted himself to the ministry.  However, being a preacher’s daughter is something that most people will never completely understand.

First of all,  growing up I always felt the pressure to be more than simply “good enough” beause anything I did would reflect negatively on his parenting and ultimately his ministry.  Whether this fear was real or irrational, I don’t completely know.  But I do know that there definitely are those people that judge others based on the choices of their children which is completely unfair.  Even now, I still feel people question everything that I am becoming as I venture out into the world on my own.

Second, you are forever identified by whose child you are.  In certain circles, if I say my last name I am already associated as an elder’s daughter.  Again, this is not necessarily a bad thing, but people often carry preconceived notions about who I am and what I should act like.  Sometimes it just nice to be Haley, with absolutely no association to my dad’s ministry.

Third, when your father plays an important role in the running of the church, it may mean that you almost live at church (especially if it’s on the smaller side).  If the doors were open, you were probably there.  “I’m tired” was never a valid excuse.  

Fourth, people always want to talk to you, but it’s hardly ever about the things you actually want to talk about, at least until you get older.  No one realizes that preachers’ kids question their faith, leave the church, have life struggles.  If you know a preacher’s kid, give them a break from the church and take them to a playground or a movie or coffee.  That’s where real life happens anyway.

Fifth, my dad being a preacher is not the only reason I’m a Chrstian.  Yes, my parents raised me in church and showed me love and taught me about God (it is truly a blessing), but in the end, if I had never had a personal experience with God, I WOULD NOT be following Christ.

Lastly, not all preachers’ kids are destined for the ministry.  That is a particular call God has placed on some of our lives, but not all.  It is okay for a pk to go into business, medicine, science, or any other field that’s not full-time ministry.  And it is perfectly fine if they make that their place of ministry.

Trust me, it is a wonderful blessing to a have a father that is able to speak the word of God to others and tries to embody what it means to be a man of God.  But as a preacher’s daughter, I think my life is pretty normal, lacking any special expectations or requirements.  It’s a part of who I am, but not necessarily my identity.  

I am just Haley.


Leaving Room

I’ve found in my life that nothing is set in stone…or maybe that the only thing set in stone is Jesus.  Either way, life is full of curve balls; it’s full of changes and new adventures.  This is especially true for my life.

Let me just tell you about my schedule for next semester: I have probably changed it no less than 15 times.

I’m trying to go to Pakistan next summer and it looks like the trip will be cancelled.

I’ve found myself at a place where I can’t even plan because life is changing so quickly.

But change can be good. In the midst of all this chaos, God has had the most amazing people walk into my life.  He is beginning to cultivate my gift of poetry, reminding me of the power of my words.  He has given me people that speak life into my dreams and believe in me.  He has showed me that my past struggles can help others heal.  He has rekindled my heart for intercession and covering people, dreams, and fears in prayer.  He renewed my passion.

So here’s a few things God has been teaching me in this season.

  1. Everyone wants someone to fight for them. It seems like a weird concept, but couldn’t be more true.  Life is a struggle and everyone is looking for someone to look them in the eyes and say “I’m with you.”  Someone who won’t give up on you, but will pray for and dream with you.  Are you willing to go to battle for someone’s soul, for their light to outshine their darkness, for them to not settle for ordinary, but become something extraordinary? Fight for someone.
  2. Words matter. Mean them.  There is possibly no greater feeling than someone telling you that they’re proud of you or that they believe in you, someone speaking your worth to you.  Be truthful, even if it hurts.  If you can’t tell someone the truth, then you may have made your relationship with them an idol.  I am on my own journey to speak truth that only the Holy Spirit can dictate.  Eph 4:15 …speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ.
  3. Timing is EVERYTHING!  This year has left me wondering why so many new relationships. Why now? Why these people? All I can figure is that in God’s divine plan I need these people in my life at this time.  I don’t know how long some people will stay or under what circumstances they will leave, but I know that he has something for me to give and something for me to gain from the people around me.

God has a plan. Life is an adventure.  Spare no time loving people.



Sophomore Year {the struggle}

This year has been pretty interesting to say the least.  God has been blessing me with a plethora of new friendships.  However, there has been one theme that keeps resurfacing:


Why is it that we have made it taboo to be in the midst of a struggle? to have a lifelong struggle?

This year I have never been more aware of my struggles both past and present…and things that will probably continue into my future.  I have realized the beauty of the struggle and struggling with others.  God is making me completely aware of my struggles and helping me to reconcile them to Himself.

So Here’s a few:

1. My sister accused me of not being Christ-like.  I don’t like criticism, but I apologized.

2. Soccer has not been going as I’ve planned it.  It hurts to trust Him, but I am doing it.

3. I still feel that the body of Christ is often an unsafe place to share my struggles with.  He is calling me to vulnerability and I am walking in it.

4. Sometimes my passions reveal all too much about my struggles. I don’t want to be judged, but I must fight for what I believe is right.

5. Sharing my writing is a scary feeling. God tells me to speak His words and I am opening my mouth in obedience.

Let’s Struggle Together

Romans 5:2-5

…And we boast in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.


So I just want to celebrate  some of what God has done this summer:

1. He taught me how to embrace the call of leadership.

2. He spoke His truths through me.

3. He showed me that prayer is my most powerful weapon.

4. He once again confirmed my call to missions.

5. He has made my fear a driving force to take me to places where I’ve never been,

6. He was faithful on my trip to Costa Rica.

7. He drew people that I admire closer into my life.

8. He gave me a vision for someone I love and it constantly gives me hope.

9. He gave me a heart for the people I will be leading.

10. He let me discover what it means to just be His.

11. He gave me the knowledge to fix my computer and then fixed what I couldn’t!

12. He blessed my mom to be able to help me move into school and rent a car while there.

13. He shaped my heart for worship through learning piano.

14. He gave me the courage to make some very important life decisions.

15. He has made me excited for change.

16. He allowed me to be able to see and be inspired by my favorite spoken word artist Miss Terious Janette…iks at Rhetoric 2013.

17. He gave me an abundance of family time and memories.

18. He changed my mental mindset to always push through because He is my rock.

19.  He gave me beauty for ashes, joy for mourning and praise for heaviness, so that I may be called an oak of righteousness.

Thank you God for 19 years and for giving me even more blessings to grow on 🙂

❤ Haley

The L Word


The word I quite possibly dread more than anything else. I hate the titles, the expectations to impact people.  I just wanna love on people, and God (the King of Irony) decided it would be a great idea to give me the attributes that many look for in leaders.  So in order to be a D-group (discipleship small group for freshman girls) leader I have to read this book called spiritual leadership and it’s really been teaching me some things.  There are a lot of leaders who used to be just like me, despising the title and passing off leadership roles as soon as possible.  But then they have that moment of recognition that they have been outright rejecting Christ’s call on their lives, that God has put things in them that the world obviously needs. Wow. Ain’t that a slap in the face? Like oh you wanna serve God?…then stop denying Him the joy of using you for His purpose.  I think I just doubt the power of God in me.  I mean He’s given us access to the Kingdom through the Holy Spirit, yet we still find ourselves in doubt.  This whole “preparing for leadership” thing has taught me the difference between faith and trusting.

Faith: God can do it, He can come through.  It’s knowing and believing God’s nature and His promises.

But trusting is like faith put in action.  It’s knowing that God can will do what He said, more than just theories and nature, but a God that comes through.

So I want to be more trusting and walk into who God has created me to be.  Leadership is in no way an expectation of perfection, but simply a call to be open and vulnerable and encourage others through the daily grind of life.  It’s a greater responsibility to make yourself accountable and walk with integrity.  But most of all it a beautiful chance to be used by God to show His great God and relentlessly pursue His presence. Is it pressure? Yes. But all I can do is cling to God and not allow the fear of punishment and losing position to dictate my actions.  Instead, I want my actions to be dictated by a heart set on the Father of Lights. All I can do is take this one step at a time and trust that God will guide me.

Costa Rica

I just got back from Costa Rica yesterday and it really was an amazing trip.  I feel like after you get back from a missions trip everyone wants to know the specifics of how God moved in your life, what you did, and on a scale of 1 to 10 how much impact did it have on your life and the lives of those you met? But God is so big that sometimes specifics will never be enough to describe who He is.  But here are just a few amazing things:

1) God reminded me how much of a blessing it is to be a student athlete at a Christian college.  Student athletes often get a bad rep, especially at a Christian college.  At a small school disheartening news and speculations spread like wildfire.  So it was amazing to see this group of people who were all great athletes, but were putting God first in their lives.  I was completely awestruck at their stories of heartbreak, pain, and incredible joy.  I felt honored to be among them.

2) God stretched me…a lot.  It was like stretching out taffy, something that is done slowly and takes a little time.  I led worship on guitar twice for our group, which took much encouragement and a ton of prayer (which is funny because I really have a heart for worship and have prayed for God to give me the opportunity to lead people into His presence…easier said than done).  Hopefully people felt God pulling on their heart strings and were moved into a place of rest in Him.  Also like the 3rd day in, He placed an amazing woman on my heart to pray for and encourage the rest of the trip, which was definitely the coolest thing ever.  And it actually didn’t freak me out like usual, but was rather refreshing and exciting.

3) God is limitless.  I so often keep my focus on Africa and the Middle East, where I’m going, and how I plan to get there.  And on this trip God was like “slow down…we’ll get there when we get there.”  So I met some amazing kids.  I heard people’s stories as we gave them Bibles.  I gave deep thought to the fruits of the Spirit.  If God is truly giving me to the nations, I want to go…to them all.  I’m up for His surprises.  I’m excited to fully experience His plans.  I don’t want to fight the leadership positions He gives me anymore.  When I cling to Him and walk humbly, it will all be okay.

So yea…those are three major things.  There are a ton more.  Like fore example, I now love rain because it brings beauty.  Costa Rica is awfully beautiful…and so were the people I ventured with, many of which have endured downpours of hurt.  After everything that has occurred in the last 10 days, I just want to sit at the feet of Jesus and say “God, you are so good.”


Psalm 36:5

Your love, Lord, reaches to the heavens,
    your faithfulness to the skies.

A Year of Seasons


This is my team (minus the person standing next to me who is my friend and decided to photobomb us)…And we have had quite the year.  There’s only 12 of us.  This picture includes our wonderful seniors that were done after our fall season was over.  Anyways, we started our fall season with 26 girls.  By the time preseason was over, we had 24.  Then at the turn of the semester, we lost another 14 girls (this includes our 5 seniors).  It was kind of a “where do we go from here?” point.  Then it hit me that God has given us a very unique opportunity, to actually take part in rebuilding our team.  We got to define what we wanted our team to be…and I think we did.  It was a little rough around the edges, but I think we learned how to be real to each other, real in our frustrations, real in our accomplishments.  We put underlying dysfunction on the table and said we need to deal with this.  How cool is that? This isn’t meant to be a tell-all about my team or some kind rant about how awesome we are (though we do have shirts that say “be more awesome” which is almost impossible), but rather it is about change.  Sometimes life throws us a curve-ball and you can stand there or you can hit it.  But it really is a beautiful thing, at least I believe it was in my team.  Next semester we we be a completely different team with 16 new freshman and only 11 returners (4 of them are goalkeepers).  We are definitely the underdog, but I’ve read that God loves to use the underdog.  I hope for their sake that we have a foundation built on God that can’t be shaken, even in the most desperate times.  I hope for our sake that we will stand on what we’ve said we believe.  This semester was a time of talk and next semester is a time of action.  If I’ve learned anything from playing soccer this year, it’s that soccer is nowhere close to my everything.  That would be God, but He has given me a talent, desire, and drive.  And I will use this talent to look each teammate in the eye and see the person behind the skills.  I want to see their hopes and dreams and the reason why God has placed them in my life, if even for a short time.  With college athletics, teams are always changing and we often schedule our lives around whatever season we are in.  But it is my prayer that no matter what the season, God is always at the center.

 11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 12 Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. 13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. –Jeremiah 29:11-13

A short blurb

God has been completely amazing throughout this whole process of raising funds for my Costa Rica missions trip.  I still have $290 to go and I can’t wait to see God show Himself faithful once again.  If you are interested in giving a tax deductible donation email me at hlowe@students.ccu.edu.  Keep our team in your prayers as we leave in 7 DAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!

My Next Adventure

After getting back from Ethiopia a little less than 2 months ago, I feel God is leading me to do something a little crazy.  My soccer team and some of the other sports at my school are planning a missions trip to Costa Rica…in May.  There is no way I  can pay for this, so it was my plan to just miss it.  1 missions trip in a year is huge, let alone 2.  I knew that some people would see me as an over-zealous college freshman traveling around the world on their money.  Besides, I’ve never really had a desire to go to Latin America.  Why would I put myself through all the physical, emotional, and spiritual strain for a place that was not even on my radar?

That’s when I realized that not going for all the wrong reasons is still wrong.  So I asked God to open my heart and tell me what he desired for me on this trip.  God told me that He wanted me to go.  He would open my heart to these people if I would just go for Him…If I could just release my plans and go where He leads me when He leads me, He will make something glorious happen.  And I’ve felt Him reassure me every time I’ve asked how this thing is going to work.  I wouldn’t say I’m necessarily excited for Costa Rica, but I’m awfully curious about what God wants to show me and how He can use me  and why this trip…why now?

Sometimes I’m asked what I will do if I don’t raise enough money…but I don’t think that is an option because what God said will be, will be.

This is me stepping out in faith.  This is me opening my hands up to what God wants to place in them.  God wants to show Himself faithful to me and I’m taking that chance.  I just want to find myself in awe of His glory.

My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus’ blood and righteousness. I dare not trust the sweetest frame, but wholly trust in Jesus’ name.

Trusting God

For the last couple of weeks I’ve really been seeking God about going on a missions trip to Costa Rica in May.  Now keep in mind that I got back from a trip to Ethiopia less than a month ago.  I have such a heart for Africa, but never really Latin America.  A few days ago I decided to soak and wait in God’s presence to here His voice.  He completely broke me down.  Mostly what I’ve been worrying about is finances.  He basically told me that He’s going to show me His power and faithfulness….and if I would let Him, He will give me a heart for those places also.  Yet, I still continued to wrestle with this.  So today I finally gave in and I stopped making excuses.  I don’t know how, but if He wants me to go, and I’m willing to trust Him, then it will be so.

Here are just some scriptures that stuck out to me yesterday.

1 Corinthians 4:20–For the kingdom of God is not in word but in power.

Colossians 1: 17 And He is before all things, and in Him all things consist.

Right now, all I have the ability to do is trust God.